Alertness= Balance

Just a few months ago I was in tune with every part of my body, nutrition, movement... Today that is not the case. I am only in touch with my ability to stay alert, so I can maximize my learning potential, and my grades. The problem is that the management of my Narcolepsy also depends keeping myself fairly healthy. The average person feels like shit if they eat shit, and do not participate in some level of activity. With my narcolepsy, and the medication that keeps me awake/alert, I sometimes lose track of traditional forms of nurturing energy, and alertness. Unfortunately I am unable to keep the unavoidable from catching up with me, and eventually I crash hard. I can ignore it in the present, but it kicks my ass when it catches up to me.

(Apologies for the TMI of the next paragraph- I warned you)

I have been struggling with the side effects of one of my meds that helps me sleep at night (cantfuckingshitregularly), and even with the addition of retarded amounts of fiber I cannot get back to normal. I also have been bleeding from the recent insertion of my IUD (late September) since October 2nd. Although I am still about another month away from it taking a toll on my body, it is dragging down my emotions. Getting off the hormonal birth control BLEW UP my sex drive (like teenage-boy style), but I really can't give my husband the fuck I want to because of my situation. I am feeling quite out of sorts with the fact that I suddenly feel this, and can't take advantage of it. Boo*Whoo*

(End TMI rant)

Anyway. I am trying to keep my shit straight, but I felt the need to whine, vent, and talk about how I feel physically. It is real, and it is what I am living.