How the...? What the...? Weight Loss.

Okay people in blog land... I THINK I lost three pounds this week. I THINK because I got on the scale and weighed 314 lbs and then I was so surprised that I got on and weighed 317 lbs a minute later. I kind of freaked out for a minute and realized that we have another scale; I jumped on that scale and weighed 314! For an experiment I weighed again and weighed 317... wait. Two different scales weighed me first at 314 and then within the same minute 317? Huh? What? Is this a conspiracy? 

Anyway. I am tentatively going to post the three pound loss... I am going to weigh myself tomorrow morning and see what happens. I will have to update you then on what the result is (besides my insanity). I want to add that if I lost three pounds-- I would celebrate! I also want to state that if I hold my weight-- I am also going to celebrate because my week really sucked and either option would be great. 

If I can maintain my weight when I have a bad week that will be a huge accomplishment. In the past a bad week could put me back 5 or 6 pounds. I would never think to celebrate maintnence but I have to change the way I think or I will explode. I think coming to terms with the fact that I am making changes even if it is not straight weight loss will make the hard times easier and different in the future. Now if I did lose weight this week maybe I can also work on putting things in perspective... that maybe I am exaggerating how bad I did because I don't know any different. You get my drift??

I have such a hard time aknowledging my success if it isn't tangible (pounds on the scale) and I think I get hung up on still punishing myself for past mistakes. So forgiving myself AND coming to terms with all aspects of my accomplishments would be my goal...